South African Satire
Issue 13, July 2004
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Saddam Employs Shaggy Defense
When asked questions related to a host of charges ranging from war crimes to genocide Hussein repeated the phrase “It wasn’t me.” Prosecution lawyers were caught off-guard by his approach and became visibly agitated as the questioning continued.
Legal defense experts around the world also expressed their
surprise at Hussein’s choice of defense, expecting instead a complex defense that
challenged the legitimacy of the court itself.Jonnie Cochran, who gained celebrity status by defending OJ Simpson in one of the most publicised trials in history, declined an offer to defend Hussein last month. He did, however give his comment on the case:
“I take offense at it being called the ‘Shaggy defense’. I had OJ saying ‘it wasn’t me’ a long time ago”, said Cochran. “Personally, I would have taken the Saddam case but there was no glove, metaphorically speaking that is.”
In a very brief exclusive interview with the sjambok Hussein said he could once again thank the America for giving him the edge when he needed it. “When I fought the Iranians, the Americans gave me guns, missiles and F-14’s. How ironic is it that when I have to face my own country, it is an ex US Marine pop star that has provided me with a defense! In fact, I had never heard the song, or even hip-hop or rap for that matter, until I was jailed. The guard’s play it all the time. Tupac’s ‘Me against the world’ is the bomb too!”
The trial continues.
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